Tuesday, March 23, 2010

food as a weapon?

in chillicothe, i don't have TV. i mean, i have a tv, but no channels. so i've been spending my downtime recently catching up on oscar-nominated films (up in the air, the blindside) and tv-on-dvd. i am fairly obsessed with glee. in fact, i'm embarassed to admit how many times i have watched the dvds. even all the sex and violence in true blood could not divert my attentions from the mesmorizing saccharinity and sly humor which is glee.

my point? since the glee kids are living in the sub-basement of the high school hierarchy, they are frequently accosted with slushie baths.

granted, i have not been in high school for some time, but i don't recall ever being drenched in high fructose corn syrup or smacked in the face with hostess cupcakes. and, as you may well imagine, i was fairly nerdy. i don't even remember a food fight.

maybe it was the omnipotence of catholic educators and the baby jesus that discouraged this behavior. hell, to this day i'm still afraid to deviate from the sidewalk and cut across the grass. maybe it was single sex education. perhaps the barbarianism of boys dictates food be projected into another's face as a warning against those who diverge from the herd. (elder alums, care to weigh in?)

did anyone else experience this phenomenon? and, whether it's throwing eggs or purple slushies, why is food the new scarlet letter?


JKNEPFLE said...

Don't believe I saw any food fights, but definitely a lot of examples of "barbarianism of boys" at Elder:

1. Many of the lunch trays had the word "shlong" written on them in permanent black ink. For some reason, they kept using them. :)

2. If you dropped a plate or tray, the whole cafeteria would erupt in a loud, prolonged "HEY!!!!" To this day, when someone drops something, I have to suppress that urge.

3. When I was a senior, we took an economics class with a young-ish first year female teacher. She was really a spanish teacher, who had been recruited to teach econ. We had to do presentation/debate on the economic benefits/ecological detriment of a case study involving a company polluting a lake. (Here's where it involves food...) One group had a guy stand outside the window of the classroom and as they were talking about the destruction of pollution on the wildlife of the lake, he threw a dead fish in through the window and on to the floor. :)

Anonymous said...

IS VERY GOOD..............................

k said...

josh- the fish story cracks me up. reminds me of this poor french teacher we had freshman year. what 5'2" 24-yr guy is enough of a masochist to want to teach french at an all-girls high school? we threw lots of his stuff, including his coveted koosh ball, right out la fenetre. but throwing a fish in, that's inspired.

JKNEPFLE said...

LOL @ "coveted koosh ball" :)